5 Dead giveaways that you’re not a New Yorker

The Holidays in New York mean one thing: tourists. The week of Christmas through New Years, the city clears out of actual New Yorkers and is filled with tons of well-meaning tourists. They walk the streets with shining eyes attempting to take it all in. However, this is downright annoying to anyone who lives here and is just trying to get to work on time (Or back from lunch. Or anywhere, really). To avoid incurring the wrath of the few New Yorkers left in the city this week, internalize the following 5 dead giveaways that you’re not from here and act accordingly.

Mean Girls has the perfect quote for every situation. #YouDon'tEvenLiveHere

Mean Girls has the perfect quote for every situation. #YouDon’tEvenLiveHere

1. Walking along on the sidewalk and then just stopping in the middle of it…For. No. Reason.
Okay, maybe you stopped for a reason (i.e. to check your phone for directions), but this annoys the bejesus out of me, along with everyone else. There are people behind you rushing to get somewhere and you WILL get run into (or over) by them. No dawdling. Keep up the pace, people!

 2. Ordering a bagel the wrong way at Ess-A-Bagel.
I literally witnessed this happening last week. Tourists didn’t get how the line worked and got hollered at by the EMPLOYEES of the store. Not even the other New Yorkers trying to get their lunch. There is no time for patience when bagels are involved. None. (So read the inside scoop on how to order a bagel like a New Yorker)

 3. Standing on the wrong side of the escalator.
People, it’s not that hard. Left side of the escalator is for walking up the steps if you’re in a hurry. Right side is for standing. End of story. Harumph.

 4. Taking pictures or selfies on the subway.
First of all, we call it the “train” (not to be confused with an actual train, like the Metro-North or Amtrak). Second of all, the subway is absolutely disgusting and grimy, so any reason why you would want to commemorate this moment is beyond me. But bonus points if you get one of the countless rats scurrying along the tracks in your selfie…

5. Attempting to hail a cab that already has passengers.
Granted, this took me an embarrassingly long time to figure out when I move to New York. Every taxi cab in the city has a little box on top of its roof with its numbers that lights up. If the light is on, then you can hail the cab. If the light is off (you’ll still be able to see the numbers, they just won’t be lit up), then it already has passengers.


Just listen to Tina Fey… #MeanGirls